Neck ache and loose wires

So, I really don't have anything at all to write about as I have no thoughts. I really need to go back to school or something. I am so bored... ugh!
I absolutely, positively cannot wait for my student loan payment, but I have to wait. Until the 23rd, so just under 3 weeks. COME ON!
I have finally got a C grade for mathematics GCSE so my 5 year plan is still right on track. Thank the gods of any and all descriptions.
My eyes are really rubbish and I am getting an eye-test as soon as I get money. I am thinking of getting prescription sunglasses, which will be very novel, if a little late for this year, the sun has already given up... tut!

Stir Crazy

I haven't left the house in 2 days and my sleeping pattern is all messed up again... :(
Need to go out, anywhere, tomorrow (today, you know?) and smell the fresh London air that I miss oh so much. I wish it wasn't this way.
One day I shall live alone and do as I please and all will be well in the world, or at least this small corner of it that is mine. Is that too much to ask? Perhaps, perhaps.
My friend told me I need to let people 'in' more. Maybe that story about the little goat children and the wolf got to me more than I realised. HAHAHA. OK lame joke, but I just don't see why others are so concerned with my single status. She said 'you're so lovely and intelligent, and people can see that, but you push them away!' I thought: uh huh.
And...?

My Oh My...

it's been a long time. I am recovering from a damaged hand, but all is well if still a little numb. Nerve damage?
Bored as hell and cannot wait for 3rd year to start so that it'll finish and then I can get onto the career-stage of my life.
I FINALLY got Swastika Night, the novel about a dystopian Nazi future... can't wait to read it and at least this way I have to read it for a valid reason and so the price tag is worth it. I already have a ton of books to read but Millie and Tia aren't getting along so am paranoid and hyper aware of them and can't just relax and read a fucking book.

Think I should attempt to get some sleep now (but will read a little of my book first!)

just to stop smoking and stop drinking, yeah I've been thinking I've got my reasons...

I need to stop drinking, especially on a night out when I am feeling drunk. I used to know my limits. I am such a fucking idiot. I am resolved. I need to stop. STOP!
I have 2 weeks before several things happen. First, student loan payment comes on 4th May, then 2 dissertation proposals are due (of which, ONE is done), then my place-name origin project is due (first draft done-ish), then nearer the end of May my 2 final essays are due of which NOTHING is done. UH OH
Mathematics now. W00t, as they say. Although really it's an FML moment

Procrastination is cancerous

and I really need to stop procrastinating and get on with some goddamn work... ugh!
I am hoping that by typing this I am getting the ball rolling and kick-starting my mind into writing.
I need to write two dissertation proposals. That's all. Maybe I'll do it now!

The British Library

After many years of frustration, I have finally successfully joined the British Library. What a weird place. You must enter the Reading Room with only some paper and pencils in a clear plastic bag. On the clear plastic bags are many rules. NO COATS, BAGS AND UMBRELLAS; NO PENS OR HIGHLIGHTERS; NO SHARP IMPLEMENTS; NO FOOD, DRINK OR BOTTLED WATER; NO CAMERAS (forgetting that 99% of mobile phones have cameras on them) and remember to have clean dry hands. They'd check behind your ears if they could.
The locker room is also very hilarious, being almost exactly like a swimming pool changing room. I could almost smell the chlorine and nearly stripped to my underwear in preparation for the pool. I contained myself though and behaved myself (by that I mean I didn't laugh inappropriately).
And on that note, I think I am spending far too much time alone as I am forgetting (or not caring to remember?) how to behave in public. I mutter to myself and give vent to my dark thoughts about my fellow human beings. I cannot wait for this degree to be over so I can get on with having a life. Or what might pass for one anyway...

On a more positive note, I really would like to write my dissertation on dystopian fiction and having skim read a thrilling book on social commentary and dystopian fiction I know I would hooked on the topic and actually find it interesting! Hmmm good luck to me on getting my proposal accepted!

Anyway, onward and upward. Must finish my Learning Journal (it IS due next week!).

good past friends and odd dreams

Facebook has finally done the decent thing and put me in contact with someone I a) don't already hang out with/see and b)had no way of contacting. Thank God for Facebook. For once. So nice to hear from her... funny how things change and yet don't change at all. Interesting.
Had an odd dream. Nuff said.
I want to go out, but my friends are wankers and I'm bored of my own company. Maybe I'll randomly call someone and hope for my boredom to be sated that way.
I'm hungry. WeightWatcher's Chicken Noodle Soup is wack, although only 1/2 a point. Which is good. I suppose, reluctantly.
I need a flat.